Never Underestimate Radical Vision

… this guy has the comedy down, oh, wait.

I don’t doubt this man’s conviction but I still find this a little scary. I do think that Kent should take note though.

This is good stuff, a must read.

Now here are the rules from the male side These are our rules!

Please note… these are all numbered “1″

ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.

You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.

We need it up, you need it down.

You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides.

Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.

And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.

Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do.

Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don’t Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.

Not both.

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” We will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine… Really

1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping.

If you ever needed a reason to brush off those pathetic sales attempts by your coworkers in the office, read this. It will give you the ammunition to fight back the overbearing requests to drain your wallet.

Thanks for pointing this out Chris.

Hugh is just a funny, funny man. Check out other drawings at http://www.gapingvoid.com.

“Yakety yak, God’s talking back!”

……………………..

I often wonder if this is the MIT Ryan and David really went to. I wonder when registration starts.

Note: The file is a MP3 in a zip file.  Take a listen it is one of the funniest things I have ever listened to.

You know that you have grown up in the 80’s and early 90’s if:

• You’ve ever ended a sentence with the word “SIKE”
• You watched the Pound Puppies.
• You can sing the rap to the “Fresh Prince of Bel-air”, and can do the “Carlton”.
• Girls wore biker shorts under their skirts and felt stylishly sexy.
• You yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried to start a club of our own.
• You owned those lil’ Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls.
• You know that “WOAH” comes from Joey on Blossom.
• Two words: Hammer Pants
• If you ever watched “Fraggle Rock”
• You had plastic streamers on your handle bars… and “spokey-dokes” or playing cards on your spokes for that incredible sound effect.
• You can sing the entire theme song to “DuckTales” (Woo ooh!)
• It was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
• You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.
• You saw the original “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” on the big screen…and still know the turtles names.
• You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
• You made your mom buy one of those clips that would hold your shirt in a knot on the side.
• You played the game “MASH” (Mansion, Apartment, Shelter,House)
• You wore stonewashed Jordache jean jackets and were proud of it.
• L.A. Gear….need I say more?
• You wanted to change your name to “JEM” in Kindergarten. (She’s truly outrageous.)
• You remember reading “Tales of a fourth grade nothing” and all the Ramona books.
• You know the profound meaning of “WAX ON, WAX OFF”
• You wanted to be a Goonie.
• You ever wore fluorescent clothing. (some of us… head-to-toe)
• You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off and his cheeks shifted.
• You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.
• You took lunch boxes to school… and traded Garbage Pail Kids in the schoolyard.
• You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets.
• You still get the urge to say “NOT” after every sentence.
• You remember Hypercolor t-shirts.
• Barbie and the Rockers was your favorite band.
• You thought She-ra (Princess of Power!) and He-Man should hook up.
• You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged handmade friendship bracelets.
• You ever owned a pair of Jelly-Shoes. ( neon colors)
• After you saw Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure you kept saying “I know you are, but what am I?
• You remember “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up”
• You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates.
• You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide.
• You have ever played with a Skip-It.
• You had or attended a birthday party at McDonalds.
• You’ve gone through this nodding your head in agreement.
• You remember “Popples”.
• “Don’t worry, be happy”
• You wore like, EIGHT pairs of socks over tights with high top Reeboks.
• You wore socks scrunched down (and sometimes still do…getting yelled at by “younger hip” members of the family)
• You remember boom boxes.. and walking around with one on your shoulder
• You remember watching both “Gremlins” movies.
• You know what it meant to say “Care Bear Stare!!”
• You remember watching “Rainbow Bright” and “My Little Pony Tales”
• You thought Doogie Howser/Samantha Micelli was hot.
• You remember Alf, the lil furry brown alien from Melmac.
• You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool… and don”t even flinch when people refer to them as “NKOTB”.
• You knew all the characters names and their life stories on “Saved By The Bell”
• You know all the words to Bon Jovi – SHOT THROUGH THE HEART.
• You just sang those words to yourself.
• You remember watching Magic vs. Bird.
• Homemade Levi shorts.. (the shorter the better)
• You remember when mullets were cool!
• You had a mullet!
• You still sing “We are the World”
• You tight rolled your jeans.
• You owned a banana clip
• You remember “Where’s the Beef?”
• You used to (and probably still do) say “What you talkin’ about Willis?”
• You had big hair and you knew how to use it.
• You’re still singing shot through the heart in your head, aren’t you!!!

I own a Powerbook, have an iPod and would love a G5.  That being said I am a little biased but I still think this is really funny.  If you remember the Apple ads that were ran to try to get people to switch to a Mac by sharing how the Windows based PC sucks then this will make more sense.  While I don’t agree with what this person is saying it is a great short.

Click here to view the movie

After trip to the Mexican restaurant that used to be Gringos in the Northpark Mall, I believe Kent could really use such a device.

Kent’s device

This just goes to show that all that hard work and dedication that Ryan and David put into the field of engineering really can make a difference.

Now this is a funny story. I cannot believe that they actually sell this in Japan. If it really worked it would save a lot of men about 3000 dollars.

Now some interesting questions arise, oops, sorry, from this:

• Could this ringtone effect men?
• Do the breasts only grow so large and stop, or would they continue to grow until they burst?
• What would your typical high school start looking like?
• Could someone sue you for trying to grow their breasts against their consent?

Crazy, just crazy. Although, I am looking into his ringtone that will cure baldness. Surely it should work, right?

No wonder ringtones are now a 3+ billion dollar business. We just need David or Ryan to make a ringtone that will make us rich.